Chord/Tab song: If That Aint Country

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#
#Robert Frasier asked for this song.It's a little 'crude' in places, but
#lots of fun to do for the right audience.If you need it, an explanation
#of the Nashville Number System can be found by following this link path:
#Cowpie/Resources/Lessons/NashvilleNumberSystem#3.For further help,
#email Tom at [email protected].
#
#Tom Rivers
#

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#IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY
#David Allen Coe
#
#(SING)
#IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, IT'LL HAIRLIP THE POPE
#IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, IT'S A DAMN GOOD JOKE
#I'VE SEEN THE GRAND OL' OPRY AND I'VE SEEN JOHNNY CASH
#IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, I'LL KISS YOUR ASS
#(TALK)
#THE OLD MAN WAS COVERED WITH TATTOOS AND SCARS
#HE GOT SOME IN PRISON AND OTHERS IN BARS
#THE REST HE GOT WORKIN' ON OLD JUNK CARS - IN THE DAY TIME
#
#THEY LOOKED LIKE TOMBSTONES IN OUR YARD
#AND I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM WHEN HE WASN'T TARD - AND MEAN
#
#HE SOLD USED CARS TO MAKE ENDS MEET
#COVERED WITH GREASE FROM HIS HEAD TO HIS FEET
#CUSSIN' THE SWEAT AND THE TEXAS HEAT - AND MOSQUITERS
#
#AND THE NEIGHBORS SAID WE LIVED LIKE HICKS
#BUT THEY BRUNG THEIR CARS FOR PA TO FIX - ANYHOW
#
#HE WAS VETERAN PROUD, TRIED AND TRUE
#HE'D FOUGHT 'TIL HIS HEART WAS BLACK AND BLUE
#DIDN'T KNOW HOW HE'D MADE IT THROUGH - THE HARD TIMES
#
#HE'D BOUGHT OUR HOUSE ON THE GI BILL
#BUT IT WASN'T WORTH ALL HE'D HAD TO KILL - TO GET IT
#
#HE DRANK PEARL IN A CAN AND JACK DANIELS BLACK
#CHEWED TOBACCO FROM A MAILPOUCH SACK
#HAD AN OLD DOG THAT WAS TRAINED TO ATTACK - SOMETIMES
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#HE GOT DRUNK AND MEAN AS A RATTLESNAKE
#AND THERE WASN'T TOO MUCH THAT HE WOULD TAKE - FROM A STRANGER
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#(SING)THERE WAS 13 KIDS AND A BUNCH OF DOGS
#A HOUSE FULL OF CHICKENS AND A YARD FULL OF HOGS
#(TALK)AND I SPENT THE SUMMERTIME CUTTIN' UP WOOD FOR THE WINTER
#(SING)TRYIN' LIKE THE DEVIL TO FIND THE LORD
#WORKIN' LIKE A DEMON FOR MY ROOM AND BOARD
#(TALK)A COAL BURNIN' STOVE, NO NATURAL GAS
#AND IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, I'LL KISS YOUR ASS
#(TO CHORUS)
#
#(TALK)
#MAMA SELLS EGGS AT THE GROCERY STORE
#MY OLDEST SISTER IS A FIRST RATE WHORE
#DAD SAYS SHE CAN'T COME HOME ANYMORE - AND HE MEANS IT
#
#MA JUST SITS AND KEEPS HER SILENCE
#SISTER SHE LEFT 'CAUSE DAD GOT VIOLENT - AND HE KNOWS IT
#
#MAMA SHE'S OLD FAR BEYOND HER TIME
#FROM CHOPPIN' TOBACCO AND I'VE SEEN HER CRYIN'
#WHEN BLOOD STARTED FLOWIN' FROM HER CALLOUSED HAND - AND IT HURT ME
#
#SHE'D JUST KEEP WORKIN' TRYIN' TO HELP THE OLD MAN
#TO THE END OF ONE ROW AND BACK AGAIN - LIKE ALWAYS
#
#SHE'S BEEN THROUGH HELL SINCE JUNIOR WENT TO JAIL
#WHEN THE LIGHTS GO OUT SHE AIN'T NEVER FAILED
#TO GET DOWN ON HER KNEES AND PRAY - BECAUSE SHE LOVES HIM
#
#TOLD ALL THE NEIGHBORS HE WAS OFF IN THE WAR
#FIGHTIN' FOR FREEDOM - HE'S GOOD TO THE CORE - AND SHE'S PROUD
#
#NOW OUR PLACE WAS A GRAVE YARD FOR AUTOMOBILES
#AT THE END OF THE PORCH WAS FOUR STACKS OF WHEELS
#AND TIRES FOR SALE FOR A DOLLAR OR TWO - CASH
#
#(SING)THERE WAS 50 HOLES IN THE OL' TIN ROOF
#ME AND MY FAMILY WAS LIVIN' PROOF
#(TALK)OF PEOPLE WHO FORGOT ABOUT POOR WHITE TRASH
#AND IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, I'LL KISS YOUR ASS
#
#(TO CHORUS, THEN END WITH)
#(SING)I'M THINKIN' TONIGHT OF MY BLUE EYES
#CONCERNING THE GREAT SPECKLED BIRD
#I DIDN'T KNOW GOD MADE HONKY- TONK ANGELS
#(TALK) AND IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, I'LL KISS YOUR ASS
#
[1][1] [4] [5] [1] (Singing verses)
[1] [1][1][4] [5][5][1][1]